quinta-feira, 5 de abril de 2012

The world is ugly (even when it seems wonderful)

I was seeing a documentary in National Geography about lions.
I just can't see wildlife documentaries, it brings me down and I cry all the time I just get divided between the admiration of see how beautiful the wildlife is but in the other hand how savage and cruel life is...there's no peace anywhere, and in wildlife even less!
Why do have animals to kill each other to eat? I mean, I know some have to do it (like lions, bears, reptiles, dolphins, seals and so on),but  it's  just bloodthirsty, evil and wrong!
Everytime I see those documentaries I get depressed.
This documentary was about a single lioness mum mom with 3 lion cubs, she and her family were just expelled from the lions group (I don't know why 'cause I didn't see the documentary from the beggining) and the lion cubs run with their mom for their lives...then they get to a pond, the lion mum and two of of the 3 cubs cross it...but one lion stays behind because he has fear of getting in the water, the little lion's mum and brothers are waiting for him and when the little lion gains enough courage to cross the river...he is eaten by a crocodile! You can't imagine my whimper when I saw that atrocity! I never could imagine this could be possible! It was very sad to see!
Then the lion mum just stays in the other side of the river with her eyes fixed in the infinite and after a few moments leaves the place with the two survivor lions.
The struggle for survival remains tough: the lioness mum has to eat and feed the two little lions but to go hunting she has to leave alone her little lions and it can be dangerous specially because other lions...
There's a particularly heartbroken part: when the lioness mum goes hunting and tries to kill a baby buffalo but then the mum of the baby buffalo fights with the lioness to protect her baby.
It was a heartbreaking scene to watch two mums fighting for the survival of their babies!!! I know it's natural the hunting, but see how those mums fighted for the survival was just not right...the buffalo mum and the lioness mum all they want is their kids to survive but they have to obbey to the law of the food chain!
Then the lioness quits and the baby buffalo gets alive of this but bleeding...and the two little lions stay hungry one more day!
Well I just switched the channel I was sick of seeing that but when I peered I understood there was just one lion kid left and the lioness mum abandoned him (I don't why)...but in the end I think she comes back to her little lion and becomes the leader of the lioness group when the Lion boss dies and lionesses go search her and form a group.
In the end they said that the number of wild lions decreased from 450 000 to 20 000 in only 50 years!!! It's really urgent to save this beautiful creature.

Seeing wildlife documentaries shock me, the last time (before this) I saw one I cried again (a lot), I just remeber a gazelle giving birth to her baby and then the little gazzelle runs happy in the wild...and then is hunted and eaten by a cheetah! Was that all the life of the innocent gazelle? a few moments of happiness and ilusion? WORLD SUCKS! I DON'T LIKE THE WAY IT'S DONE AND PREVIOUSLY DECIDED TO BE!
So I think I'll just stop seeing wildlife documentaries again, it's so shocking: everything is ok and perfect for a while and then you only see huntings and blood...I can't see that, I know this is the shit of world God built for us (if there is a God anyway) but well I just don't agree with how this is made and all this blood batles for surviving affects me...what can I do? I just can't accept that the world is this shit! I really can't! It's sad! 
Does God have a soul or a heart? 'cause I think this is heartbreaking and souless world. 
This ain't a miracle and this is no miraculous life!

The world is ugly...even when it seems wonderful.

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