I don't want to be happy

Anyways I don't like to hang out with happy people and positive people...they are DAMN boring, they have ANY interesting converstation, they almost don't talk they just smile and live simply like they were flowers catching some sun, they seem to be simply stoned and took a trip to nowhere...moreover who can discuss the world with those people? they avoid at all cost to speak about politics, philosophy, economy...they don't read the news and certainly they do not care about History...hapy people make me sick, I don't want to be happy (even because it's impossible in my views) and I just simply do not see the point of building up a castle of lies to make you happy that's all. I've been meeting too much happy people or wanna be happy people in this life...they bore me and I do not want to be one of them, this is the main reason I want to be alone, you guys pretend this life is perfect while I focus on the shit all this is, I chosed walking on the dark side of life and I'm sure it will get me closer to the truth. Happy people rather a beautiful lie that makes them smile, I prefer a true that makes me cry and the only thing standing between me and them is reality.